I have this lasting memory of growing up in a home with Dad in his chair and Mom in the kitchen. What became special to me was simply seeing them smile. With each other.
For some reason I was happy if they were happy, and the scene I savor is the two of them dancing.
They were in sync, a toe-tapping, hip-swirling, dancing machine. It was like the Jitterbug but Mom and Dad made their own moves. Mom was smiling. Dad was smiling. The music was smiling. And I knew the cue, the song that would make it happen — Glenn Miller's "In the Mood."
I was a teen. My only experience had been square dancing in grade school. It was scary being told to grab your partner — which was a girl! But ... a few years later it was a girl who pulled me to one of those high school dances where the girls ask the guys.
I couldn't fill my dad's shoes, but I eventually found my steps. I soon discovered everyone finds their own patterns. Mary Oliver spells it out nicely in this poem:
"Three Things to Remember"
As long as you're dancing, you can break the rules.
Sometimes breaking the rules is just extending the rules.
Sometimes there are no rules.
I wish my parents had danced more. Right there in our living room. Shut off the TV, let that 45 drop "In the Mood." I can see them now. I hear it. They are swinging and smiling.
And I am grinning. Because suddenly there are no rules.
I’m Lonny Cain … and that’s my Perspective.
