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Majority of Gen Z swipe left on dating people with opposite political views

Trevor Keller, left, and Rhiannon Constanzo, right, walk to drop off Keller's mail-in ballot on the campus of Penn State University in Oct. 2024. Keller and Constanzo, who have been in a relationship for more than a year, voted for opposing political candidates in the 2024 election.
Elena Moore
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NPR News
Trevor Keller, left, and Rhiannon Constanzo, right, walk to drop off Keller's mail-in ballot on the campus of Penn State University in Oct. 2024. Keller and Constanzo, who have been in a relationship for more than a year, voted for opposing political candidates in the 2024 election.

On a breezy Saturday morning last October, Penn State University student Trever Keller walked through campus to drop off his mail ballot. The presidential election was about a week away and he was voting for the first time.

"It feels exciting," he said. "Excited to get to put my opinion out there."

Keller, now 21, voted for Vice President Kamala Harris in the fall, largely because he supported her policies on safeguarding abortion access. Rhiannon Costanzo, standing next to him, felt differently. Driven by more conservative views on abortion and immigration, she cast her ballot for President Trump, arguing Harris was too, "extreme."

Keller and Costanzo are more than just politically opposed college students: they've been in a relationship for a year.

The couple acknowledged that they don't often talk about politics, but when they do, they said it's respectful and doesn't weigh on their relationship.

"I don't think that you should pick and choose someone either over what party they align with or what their views are," said Costanzo, currently 19, who attends a school nearby and was in town for the weekend. "I think it's more important to get to know the individual person and what things in their life have shaped those views."

But these two — and their relationship — are unlike many in their generation, who have come of age during a historically politically divisive time and view political differences as relationship dealbreakers.

According to the latest NPR/PBS News/Marist poll, a majority of Americans under 45 say it's important to date or marry someone who shares their political views. It's a preference that appears to matter less and less as Americans age. Among Gen Z and young millennials — those 18-29 — six in 10 feel it's important, compared to just a third of Baby Boomers, those Americans over 60.

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The generational divide can be partially explained by a shift in what values young Americans prioritize when dating, explained Daniel Cox, a senior fellow in polling and public opinion at the American Enterprise Institute, a conservative-leaning Washington think tank.

"We do know from some of our past research that younger people are more inclined to seek out that information," he said. "A lot of people in previous generations, they report that they didn't even know the politics of the person they were dating for a good long time because it just wasn't as relevant as other information: 'Do you belong to the same church? What kind of work do you do?'"

Cox noted that at a time when many Americans now first meet online, knowing someone's politics can hold weight when deciding whether to pursue a relationship. On top of an age disparity, gender may also play a role. An AEI survey released in January found that more than half of single women were less likely to date a Trump supporter. Among single men, just a third agreed, and nearly half said it didn't matter.

"I think [for] a lot of people, it becomes an easy shorthand for character values," he said of one's political identity.

Politics is a red line for 36-year-old Maria Nozzi of Chester County, Pennsylvania who participated in NPR's survey.

"I wouldn't be able to be in a relationship with somebody who doesn't have the same moral viewpoints that I do," said Nozzi, who leans progressive and says her boyfriend is aligned with her politically. "It's not even political discourse. It's what you think is right and what you think is wrong."

31-year-old Abby Smith and her husband are Republicans living in the Dallas-Fort Worth area of Texas. She has watched couples navigate having different political views, including her parents.

"From what I've seen, either the political views converge or they wind up getting divorced," she said, adding it was the latter for her parents. "I just think as you build a life with someone, you start raising kids, these things tend to come out more."

She argued that lines have blurred between political and cultural issues, making ideological differences potentially harder to reconcile.

"Now so many … cultural issues are part of politics as well that essentially if you had different politics, you would have a completely different world view," Smith said.

However, she acknowledged that for some individuals, it may come down to how strongly held their beliefs are.

NPR's survey suggests dating someone with opposing political views may be less of a problem for individuals who don't identify with either major political party. While majorities of both Democrats and Republicans say having a partner with the same politics is important, 60% of independents don't think having the same politics makes a good partnership.

21-year-old Trevor Keller, left, and 19-year-old Rhiannon Constanzo, right, say being about to talk about politics and their varying viewpoints makes their relationship stronger and they learn from each other. Still, most people in their generation — 6 in ten — saying different political views are a deal breaker in relationships.
Elena Moore / NPR News
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NPR News
21-year-old Trever Keller, left, and 19-year-old Rhiannon Costanzo, right, say being about to talk about politics and their varying viewpoints makes their relationship stronger and they learn from each other. Still, most people in their generation — 6 in ten — saying different political views are a deal breaker in relationships.

Several months into Trump's second term, Rhiannon Costanzo and Trever Keller, the college students in Pennsylvania, continue to push past the idea that political differences are a deal breaker.

"I feel like for the most part, we keep it pretty light-hearted," Costanzo said as they spoke on a joint video call from their separate campuses. She recalled how after the election, she would playfully quip to Keller, "Well, my guy won!"

Keller laughs as she tells the story. After the election, he was disappointed by Harris' loss and grew concerned about some of Trump's early second-term actions. He works in a research lab on campus and was worried during the school year about the prospect of federal spending cuts impacting his job, though he doesn't think that's happened. He says he and Costanzo don't shy away from talking about those fears and other hard discussions when they arise.

"I think if we had a … weird stigma around talking about politics, I feel like that [would] kind of become honestly worse because then we'd be less likely to talk about it," he said. "Honestly I've never felt uncomfortable talking to Rhiannon about anything."

Costanzo admits feeling a bit taken aback by the speed of Trump's actions in office so far and says that the administration's move to cut some federal spending to universities has given her pause. But she stands by her vote and says her differences in opinion with Keller strengthen their relationship.

"We can't change how the other one feels. And so you just kind of like accept it," she said.

"I think it's nice to kind of throw back and forth our ideas and kind of talk about it," she added. "I think we learn more about each other too."

Copyright 2025 NPR

Elena Moore is a production assistant for the NPR Politics Podcast. She also fills in as a reporter for the NewsDesk. Moore previously worked as a production assistant for Morning Edition. During the 2020 presidential campaign, she worked for the Washington Desk as an editorial assistant, doing both research and reporting. Before coming to NPR, Moore worked at NBC News. She is a graduate of The George Washington University in Washington, D.C., and is originally and proudly from Brooklyn, N.Y.