New Items For The School-Supplies List

Feb 26, 2018

I’m going to warn you right now: What’s going to follow is marked by sarcasm, bitterness and perhaps some faulty logic.

I believe school districts need to update their school-supply list to reflect the times. Depending on the grade level, most kids need the prerequisite pens, notebooks, notecards and calculators. But there are two things missing from that list that I think are now necessary to safely attend school in this country: bullet-proof vests and SWAT helmets. And here’s why.

It’s perfectly clear that the leadership in this country has neither the intention nor courage to protect our kids from assault weapons. It is, after all, a right to own an assault weapon. And God forbid we infringe just a little on that right, because we will descend that slippery slope to whatever the hell it is that is at the bottom of that slope.

If no one is going to do anything to diminish the threat outside our school walls, then at least give schools the tools they need keep kids safe. So, I’m officially asking the United States government to provide every student in every school in the United States those bullet-proof vests and those helmets I mentioned earlier.

Hey, and maybe the extremists in the gun lobby would even kick in little of the money they now use to lobby legislatures to help defray the cost.

Oh, and I just got another idea. How about we mobilize the National Guard? We certainly now have a national emergency to warrant such a deployment. I just hope we have enough guardsmen in this country to guard each door at each school in the United States.

I’m Andrew Nelson, and that’s my perspective.