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Poetically Yours - When the truth comes out

Provided by Erika Higgins Ross

Welcome to Poetically Yours. Poetically Yours showcases poems by northern Illinois poets, and sometimes writers from other states. This week’s poet is from Deerfield, Massachusetts.

Erika Higgins Ross is a writer and therapist. Her work has been published in Funny Pearls Womens Humour Journal, Juice Magazine, Mommy Poppins, LA.com, Your Teen Magazine, and Stagebill. Ross was a founding member of the all-girl band Big Panty. She has been awarded writing residencies at Studios of Key West and Key West Literary Seminar. She is an avid fan of public radio.

Here’s her poem “When Your Daughter Googles You.” (This poem contains adult themes.)

When Your Daughter Googles You

Make no mistake

at some point she will ache

to know you before there was her

to find out what has been

transferred and might be stuck

in her bones her blood her brain.

What if she finds a breakbeat trip-hop mix

by British deejay club boys with

your voice scratchy from post nasal drip

draining cocaine night

rave tent flashing lights at Glastonbury

sex and drugs / lost and lust.

What if she’s just old enough

to understand what you mean

when you moan

still getting high with Howie?

Just old enough to catch

thighs rubbing together?

Make no mistake

she will play it for her friends.

Say, this is my mom!

This was my mom.

Could this be my mom?

You will be proud ashamed.

Cool mom is a dangerous game.

Telling the truth the whole truth

dips you into ground too fertile

sinkhole quicksand honesty.

You say, yes that is me.

Well, that was me.

Hide how much of that rabid writhing

lead singer is lodged inside

this respectable PTA shell.

This half-alive sober body.

Joan Didion says we must keep notebooks

to stay in nodding touch

with the people we used to be.

That ethereal desire over drum and bass.

My daughter googled my name

and found my ghost.

Yvonne covers artistic, cultural, and spiritual expressions in the COVID-19 era. This could include how members of community cultural groups are finding creative and innovative ways to enrich their personal lives through these expressions individually and within the context of their larger communities. Boose is a recent graduate of the Illinois Media School and returns to journalism after a career in the corporate world.